Sarah Bellum says:
According to Cosmeticdesign.com, you can now buy an intimate hygiene product for the special guy in your life. To which I reply: Ewwwwww!
Feminine hygiene
In the past I’ve written about all sorts of cosmetic science advances for our dainty pubular regions. There’s the Bikini Kitty intimate shaving system to keep us hair free, there are female enhancement creams to keep us on fire, and let’s not forget about the Go Commando patch that lets us banish panties. But until now I haven’t had an equivalent breakthrough to share with our male readers.
Penile product
Enter Man Junk Intimate Wash, the first product to tackle the “sensitive issue of male private hygiene.” The claim to fame of this product appears to be that it removes bacteria that can lead to a bunch of problems including sexually transmitted diseases and increased risk of penile cancer. (Double ewwwww!) I don’t know where Lefty and Righty weigh in on this topic, but I find it hard to believe that a fancy-schmancy crotch wash will protect against venereal disease any better than plain old soap and water. (And if your guy’s hygiene standards are so low that he’s not even using bar soap, then good luck getting him to use Junk Wash!)
Foreskin formula
According to Cosmeticdesign.com, this product is based on natural and organic ingredients including aloe vera, lime essential oil, tea tree oil, jojoba oil and Totarol, which is a New Zealand tree extract. (Tree extract, hmmm. I’ll let you fill in your own joke here about getting “wood.”)
Anyway, I’m really curious to how this company spins advertises this product without making drug claims – they CERTAINLY can’t claim to stop penile cancer!
What do YOU think? Is Man Junk a scam or would you buy it for that special hygienically-challenged man in your life? Leave a comment and tell the rest of the Beauty Brains community all about your man’s junk!
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I would say anyone addressing any of these issues is bold. I took a hard look at the Man Junk site and it looks like they know what they are doing, at least that’s my opinion from a health conscience man. It’s definitely going to be interesting seeing what other people will say that have actually tried the product.
Mary’s Designer Purse
Mary a young nubile nude dancer
with beautiful genital structure
desired a designer vagina.
She said to her plastic surgeon,
‘I have excess skin like a cherry
on the rim of my pussy
& I have no financial backer.’
So he generously agreed to take a free ride before
& after the procedure.
He said, ‘most people don’t believe me
when I say, ‘I absolutely love my work.’
And he repeated the blurb in his glossy brochure,
‘Objectifying yourself is quickest route to happiness.
As Mary never mixed with the customers her lovely surgeon Joe
gave her a complimentary double-header special
with gyrating pearls spinning around
for her sensual pleasure.
So whenever the opportunity presented
she could play tandem with other
performers backstage between breaks.
For solo work her sweet surgeon
supplied her with a discreet toy called ‘Erotique Juicy Cherry’
to keep in her pocket or purse & insert whenever she felt
a need while dining or at the movies.
One fine day while waiting for her beauty treatment
Mary read in Vogue or Vanity Fair,
one of those glossy magazines with lovely pics of skinny chics,
an item that caught her eye & stirred her lugubrious imagination.
A brand new really cool naughty toy especially made for girls & boys
on special offer called, THE CONE!
It came in super-soft silicone with a base diameter thicker
than the span of Mary’s slender hand.
Armed with a powerful 3 volt unit delivering 3000 revs per minute,
an exciting built in program
With vibration, speed, power variation & frequencies of up to 30 hertz,
all controlled by a clever little microchip.
Mary cocked her eye, smirked,
flicked her exaggerated ponytail & said loudly,
‘I’m going to buy that little beauty.’
Other ladies in that room crowded around her to see photos
of her erotic discovery.
She knew immediately that the cone
would be better than throwing a sausage down a blind alley.
Mary gave the cone some test runs
then when thoroughly satisfied
she rang her sweet surgeon Joe & said,
‘Hey Joe, I know you won’t believe me when I say
I never felt anything like this before.
This super-soft silicone cone makes my whole body tingle.
Wow! I now believe in technology.’
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